I loved Khadija Chapter Five
After Fatima asked for Khadija's hand in marriage to Marwan, silence and astonishment filled everyone's features. But regarding Zein and Khadija, it wasn't just astonishment. Rather, a sharp blade was pierced into both their hearts. Their hearts began to bleed silently. But Khadija was dying of grief.
Is this why you wanted me, Zein? Is this why you asked me to talk about such an important matter?
You wanted me as a wife for your brother!!
How?!!! How?
You were able to do this to me. ???!!!!
Is this why you and your mother wanted to visit us!!! Oh, you and how you hurt me!
Oh, how stupid of me, I thought you wanted me for yourself!
I thought you loved me! ! I thought you admired me! !
Does this mean that your interest in me was only as a little sister! ! Only, Zein! !?
Zain was torn apart with regret for taking so long to tell everyone about his desire for Khadija. And first and foremost, her. She was the one he loved. She was the one he adored. How could his brother want her?! Where did he see her?! Where did he like her?! Who told him about her?! Why her?! Why?! Why?! Why?!? Why?!
Fatima broke the silence. Surprised by Othman and Maryam's silence.
Fatima, suspiciously: "What, guys? I didn't hear your response. Does that mean something?"
Khadija flinched upon hearing Fatima, as if she had been lost in another world. She ran to her room, tears streaming down her cheeks. But no one noticed. She was wearing her niqab, covering her face from everyone. Even Zain couldn't see how affected she was by this conversation or discern her reaction, whether sad or shy!!!
Maryam, embarrassed and hesitantly: "Sorry, guys." She meets Khadija, but she's embarrassed.
Fatima: Yes, of course. She's usually quiet and embarrassed by her own imagination. Anyway, what do you think? I didn't hear your opinion, Hajj Othman.
Othman, in a confused tone: By God, Hajja, you, Professor Marwan, and Zein are on my mind. Don't you think that Professor Marwan is, ahem, much older than Khadija? She's only 20 years old.
Marwan's face scrunched up in anger. This is the one who prevented his mother from seeing him, and she asked him to take charge. He looked at his mother, who winked at him to be quiet.
Fatima, with confidence and certainty: First of all, there's no such thing as a professor. Marwan has always been like your son.
Secondly, don't get me wrong. We've always known that a man's only fault lies in his pocket. And Marwan, praise be to God, is powerful. May God increase him.
Not to mention that there is no shame or prohibition. The Prophet (PBUH). He was much older than Lady Aisha. And many of the Companions were older than their wives.
And Hajj Ghandour, may God have mercy on him, was 12 years older than me. So what's the problem?
Not to mention that Marwan, may God bless him, is a young man and his health is excellent, as you can see. The difference between them won't be obvious.
Othman, with conviction: "By God, you're right, madam. I myself would like a 10-year age difference between me and Maryam. And of course, Marwan is not to be blamed. It's an honor for us. What matters in all of this, and above all else, is Dija's opinion. I would never force her."
Marwan, with firmness and cunning: "No, of course not. By force, what do you mean, sir? You can ask her. If she refuses, it's okay. This marriage must be by mutual consent." When my mother brought up the subject of Khadija with me, I was excited, of course, because of your reputation and the morals of Ammar and Khadija, whom my mother and Zein talked about a lot. They encouraged me to agree and propose to Khadija. Whatever the response, it won't change the respect and friendship between us. It's enough that I'm honored by your presence.
Othman, impressed by Marwan's polite response: "May God bless you, my son. May God bring you together for the best if you are destined to be together."
Okay, before anything else, you know that we must all seek guidance from God, including Khadija. And whatever God wants is what happens. Right?
Fatima, happily: "Yes, so what? We must seek guidance from God, of course. But we want to know, first and foremost, whether Khadija agrees or not."
Othman: "Okay, go in, Mariam, and ask Khadija about her initial opinion. And let us know."
Mariam: "Yes, with your permission."
All this talk, and Zain didn't understand half of it, or almost all of it. He's lost and unaware of what's going on. Does he really know?! Does all this really happen? Are they really the ones they're talking about? They're my brother and my love!! No, no, of course I'm dreaming. No, not a dream, but a hateful nightmare that's killing me with jealousy and anger.
Oh God. I can't bear all this pain... Oh God, relieve me of what I'm going through. Oh God, don't put me through this difficult test...
Maryam went to Khadija's room, knocked on her door, and asked for permission to enter.
Khadija sadly wiped her tears and gave permission to her mother and went in.
Maryam: Dija, my love, tell me. What do you think of what you heard? Do you agree with Marwan? Should we give them a word and seek guidance from God, or what?
Khadija fell silent, thinking of Zein. Who she thought had deceived her and made her believe he loved her. And now he's coming to propose to her for his older brother. So... he stabbed me and wounded me. And I accepted. I promise you, Zein, that I will take revenge. And I will show you that I'm not the little Khadija. The one you didn't like. You didn't see her as a lover or a wife. And you introduced her to your brother. I will show you that I am a real woman, not a child.
Khadija, defying her pain and pride: I agree, Mom. And God willing, I will seek guidance.
Maryam, perplexed: Really, Dija. But you have to keep in mind the age difference. It's almost 15 years. That's not a small amount.
Khadija, indifferent: It's okay, Mom. It won't make a difference. My father himself is 10 years older than you, and you've always understood each other.
Maryam: Yes, my dear. But don't forget, your father and I are cousins. He practically raised me. He's always understood me. He's never made me upset, and he always understands my mind.
Khadija sighed bitterly. After all, it didn't matter to her. After him, men are equal, there is no difference between them.
Khadija, absent-minded and confused: Don't worry, Mom. God is generous. Please tell them I agree.
Maryam, happily: By God, you will be a bride, Dija. And the most beautiful wedding, too. I'm going to tell them.
Maryam left. Khadija threw herself on her pillow, crying bitterly and painfully.
Maryam went out and informed them of Khadija's initial agreement.
Everyone was happy, except for Zain, who was shocked. Did she really agree? How?! And the love I saw in her eyes!!!! And the eagerness that filled her voice as she spoke to me!!!! All of this is a lie?! Nonsense?! Illusions?!
No, no. How could you do this to him, Khadija? How? I love you... I swear I love you.
Fatima and Marwan's faces lit up. Marwan breathed a sigh of relief. He was afraid she would reject him, embarrass him, and humiliate his manhood in front of everyone.
Fatima happily: "Okay, what am I saying? Don't take me for granted. Marwan came with me to praise and describe Khadija. But does he have the right to see her this time? It's not clear they call it a vision."
Uncle
R: Hahahahaha, yes, auntie, her name is Ru'ya. Of course, Marwan has the right to see her.
Othman: Go in, Maryam, and call Khadija so Marwan can see her. Don't be afraid, let her go out without her niqab.
Zain shuddered as if he had been stung by a scorpion from the intensity of his anger.
What?! She's going out for my brother to see!!!! And me!!!? She's mine, she belongs to me. How?!!! How can she go out to him and he see her face?!!
Calm down, heart, calm down. If you don't calm down now, you'll smash your brother's head in. The idiot who abandoned all the women and daughters of Eve and found no one but my beloved, my little girl. Oh, you idiot. You didn't want to get married. And now you want my beloved! You want Khadija!!!?
He closed his eyes in pain as he clenched his fist. Even the blood stopped flowing into it and it was completely white from the intensity of his anger.
Ammar: Ahem. Okay, come with me, Zain. Let's stay outside until the viewing is over.
Zain got even angrier, and the blue of the sea in his eyes changed to a destructive donkey. This is what I needed. Go out, I won't let my beloved see her, brother.!!! It's permissible for him and forbidden for me. How can this be possible?!!!
What is this crazy day I'm going through?
He couldn't take it anymore. He got up, left, and headed for the outside door.
Ammar followed him, surprised by his reaction. He called out to him:
Ammar: Zain... Zain... wait, where are you going? I just don't mean to upset you. You know it won't do for Khadija to lift her veil in front of you.
Zain closed his eyes in pain.
Zain, heartbroken: I know, Ammar, I know.
Ammar: Okay, where are you going now?
Zain, holding back the tears from his heart before his eyes: I have important work to do, and I have to go down. Sorry, I'll apologize to them. Excuse me.
Ammar was surprised by Zain's behavior. He didn't know what had happened to him or why he saw such sadness in his eyes.
Khadija entered without her niqab and sat down. As soon as Marwan saw her, it was as if the world had caught fire within him. Oh my God. What beauty! Truly, if I don't marry you, who else deserves to win Marwan Al-Ghandour? But you, my beautiful Khadija. I promise you, my most beautiful Khadija, that you will be mine. Marwan Al-Ghandour's. And no one else will win you.
Khadija was embarrassed by Marwan's bold gaze that was insolently gazing at her and lowered her head in shame.
Fatima confidently said, "You saw this beauty, Marwan, so you should listen to me. Have you ever seen such beauty? Such a beautiful thing, praise be to God."
Marwan smiled with admiration, "Of course, Mom. There is no beauty like this. Khadija looks like a nymph from heaven."
Khadija was shy and nervous from his stares and their conversation. Her nervousness was evident as she rubbed her hands together in confusion.
Othman: God bless you, guys. That's your courtesy.
Fatima: What? This is the most beautiful thing I've ever seen. Come here, Dija, sit next to me, my love.
Khadija got up and sat next to Fatima, dodging Marwan's stares.
Marwan: Tell me, Khadija. Why did you choose to study law?
Khadija: I've always wanted to be a lawyer.
Marwan slyly: Umm. And you plan to work after you graduate?
Khadija looked at him fiercely: Yes, of course. So I'll just stay home.
Marwan smiled, impressed by the look of defiance he saw in this ferocious cat's eyes. He met her with an even deeper look of defiance. She wouldn't step foot in his door after completing her studies. She would be his prisoner. He wouldn't even allow anyone but him to hear her seductive voice, which rings in the ears and destroys the heart.
Othman: Tell me, Marwan, do you have a problem with Khadija's job after graduation?
Marwan, with foxlike cunning: Ahem. Of course not. She just needs to get rid of me safely, and I myself will open the biggest and best law firm for her. She will be my wife.
The words fell like a thunderbolt on Khadija's ear. Really, I'm going to marry someone other than Zein? Really, I'm going to marry another man? May God forgive you, Zein. Here, she wanted to ask about him, because when she entered, she didn't see him, not even outside. So where did he go?!
Fatima: Okay, what should I say, Haj? Let's leave the newlyweds alone for a while to talk. What do you think?
Khadija stood up angrily: No, no, of course not. Excuse me.
Khadija left and headed to her room.
Ammar: Sorry, guys, Khadija is embarrassed. Also, they shouldn't be alone together. Please don't get upset.
Marwan gritted his teeth in anger, but didn't show it. He vowed to himself that he would never leave her and would marry her no matter the cost.
Fatima: No, nothing. Tomorrow, God willing, they will sit and talk however they like.
Maryam: May God bring them together for the best.
Fatima: Amen. Okay, let's take our leave now. God willing, I await your final response, and I'm certain that Khadija will, God willing, be my son's wife.
Maryam: God willing. But why are you leaving now? It's still early.
Marwan: No, I'm sorry, I also have work to do. It's a pleasure getting to know you.
Othman: We're very happy, my son. You've honored us.
Marwan: I'm happy to be with you, Ammar. Now I know why Zein loves you so much.
Ammar: Hahaha. Zein is my love and dearest friend.
Maryam: Where is he, really?
Ammar: He came down. He says he has work and is in a hurry.
Fatima sighed: This work never ends. May God give you strength, my son. Peace be upon you.
Everyone: And peace be upon you.
He sits in front of the Nile and throws stones into the water. He exhales a hot sigh that releases his anger, sadness, and pain.
I loved you, my little girl.
I loved you, Khadija.
I adored you, my tormentor.
I agreed to keep my love and passion hidden in my chest.
I agreed to love you from afar.
You whispered to me affectionately. You looked at me with longing
You stoked my heart's fire and awakened my love's genie
I came closer to you, sipping from your perfume and the hazel color in your eyes.
I wish I hadn't.
My soul got lost. My fortresses collapsed before your eyes.
Ah, from your eyes... You promised me... You built me hopes and dreams.
And finally, you woke me up from my dreams to the nightmare of separation and parting.
Ah, Khadija, ah. From the fire of my heart.
How can I live without you? How?!
His phone rang again and again... and he didn't answer. He didn't want to talk to anyone. He didn't want to see anyone. He had enough sadness and worry that had befallen him. A tear escaped.
This is me, my life. My eyes, my eyes. My life has only cried for everything precious.
And you, my life, are the laughter of my life. You, my life, are the laughter of my life. And you are all that's left for me.
I've gotten used to buying and fulfilling my love whenever I need it.
I've never wished for anything but my hand to be shed.
I chose to live for you. I left my life in your hands.
My eyes have only ever shed tears for something precious.
My love, love isn't dreams, a story, or a tale.
And the witness of
The world and the days are for everything inside me.
Oh, the first heart I loved. And the love I felt the most.
Oh, the most beautiful beginning and end.
I am the life of my eyes. My eyes, my eyes. My eyes have never cried except for me, for everything precious.
He sighed in pain and bitterness. He didn't know what had happened. Or what would happen.
Did his little girl really get lost from him!
Did she really not love him and hold no admiration for him?
Was she really going to marry his brother?!
He leaned his head back with his eyes closed. His heart was bleeding...
And he exhaled, laden with her name.
Oh, Khadija.
She sat on her bed, huddled together, her legs drawn together, her face buried between her knees, and wept. Wept bitterly, in pain, and with hurt.
The hurt of her dignity, which was squandered while she was giving up her modesty to look at him.
She was the one who gave up her morals and spoke to him alone on the phone.
She was the one who gave up her religion and rejoiced in being in his arms and embrace. At that time, she forgot, or pretended to forget, everything. All that occupied her mind was her love for him. Her passion for him. Her comfort breathing his scent. Warming herself in the warmth of his embrace.
After all of this, he paid no attention to her. He didn't love her. He didn't like her. To him, she was just a sister. He considered himself like her brother, Ammar.
Otherwise, he wouldn't have come to propose to her for his brother. Why?
Aaaah, from you, Zein. Aaaah, from your wound.
No matter how much I hurt you in my life, no wound will ever match the wound you caused me.
It's not just a wound to my heart and soul. It's a wound to my dignity and pride.
Aaaah, from the wound to my dignity. Hard. Hard. Very, very hard.
But wait, will I really marry Marwan? Will I be able to be for another man? How? How!
No, no, I will refuse. Yes, I will refuse. I can never be for anyone else.
I only agreed then to avenge myself. But no, not to actually get married.
She cried again, repeating his name with pain and tears.
I can't, Zein. I can't, Zein.
Aaaah, Zein. Why did you do this to me? Why Zein? Why, my love, why?!
He entered the house late at night, worried. When he did, he found his brother sitting scrolling through his phone.
He looked at him with malice and hatred. His brother sensed this and raised his head from his phone screen. He spoke to him reproachfully.
Marwan: Zein, my son, you left us there and went where? Just walking away without telling me.
Zein sighed in anger at this thief who came to steal my dreams.
Zein, with a mischievous face: I had important work to do.
Marwan: Never mind. You'll make up for it at the engagement, God willing.
Zain, questioning: Why did you go propose to Khadija?
Marwan: I don't understand what you mean by "why." It's normal.
Zain, impatiently: You don't know her. You've never even seen her. Why did you go to her? And why her?
Marwan: Honestly, I didn't know her. Your mother was the one who saw her at Ammar's wedding and started talking about her again. She really likes her. And you and I have a secret conversation. You took a picture of her without noticing and showed it to me.
He sighed deeply. "Aaaah, Zain, what a story! What a beautiful girl! What a body! What hair!"
He became furious at this idiot who excelled at describing his little girl with such vulgarity and vulgarity. But you, Mom, are the reason. May God forgive you, Mom. May God forgive you.
Zain: But, but, why don't you respect yourself? She's a decent girl. Marwan: Why are you upset? Someone is describing his fiancée.!!?
Zain: But she's not your fiancée yet. You just proposed. It's not possible that she'll reject you.
Marwan, defiantly: No, she'll agree. I'm sure of it.
Zain, doubtfully: Sure! How sure? I don't understand.
Marwan, lying and slandering: No, she was looking at me up and down like that, and when I winked at her, she laughed. So she liked me, Zain, or what?
He gritted his teeth angrily. What the hell is this idiot saying? Who's looking in secret and laughing at him? Khadija!!!
No, no, it's impossible. He's definitely lying.
Zain, jealously and angrily: You're a liar. Khadija is a respectable girl who would never do something like that.
Marwan, defiantly: Liar. Why are you lying to me? And who said she's not respectable? Just someone who admires her groom. What's the problem? I'm just a street kid. What's wrong with you? You don't understand.!!?
Zain asked him, lost: Why Khadija?!?
Marwan, wondering: I don't understand what you mean. Why Khadija?!?
Zain, confused: Why is she the one you proposed to in particular, when you were against marriage completely? And don't mention those two lowlifes. Her hair and her body, you understand?
Marwan: Why are you talking to me like that? Do you forget that I'm your older brother?
Zain: Marwan the Elder is great in his actions, not his age. Tell me, why is she?
Marwan: Honestly, Zain, the first time I saw her picture, I was captivated. My heart skipped a beat, and I was sure of that today when I saw her in front of me for real. I really think I've started to love her, Zain.
Zain closed his eyes in jealousy: Where have you seen her picture before today?! Marwan hesitantly: Uh-huh... actually, on Ammar's wedding day, Mama took a picture of her and showed it to me, and I liked it...
His chest burned and he clenched his fists tightly, jealous of his mother's actions... whatever her justifications, she shouldn't have done this... and taken a picture of herself while we were unaware... and what's even worse... was for her to show it to his brother...
Zain angrily: How could my mother do that!!! How could you violate a girl's privacy and honor like that!!!! This is a trust and she should have preserved it...
Marwan curled his lips indifferently at his brother's anger... who paid no attention to him... because what he was talking about was fine... it didn't matter to him... what matters to him is the benefit he gets from anything... no matter what, he's one of those who believes that the end justifies the means, even if the means are wrong. What matters is that he gets what he wants...
Marwan, annoyed: "It's okay, but what did Mom hurt her in? She did this just for me... Anyway, forget about all this... What's important is that she liked me and I liked her, and I'm going to marry her..."
Zain, bitterly and with an absent mind: "... Enough... but don't you think she's too young for you?"
Marwan, embarrassed: "Uh-huh? No, of course not. It's okay, just like Mom said. A man shouldn't be bothered except in his own pocket. And thank God, you know." Not to mention, Khadija wouldn't be suitable for a Toto kid like these days. She needs someone with experience to know how to pamper her properly.
He was provoked by his brother's crude insinuation about his girlfriend and advanced towards him with the agility of a leopard in the blink of an eye. He grabbed his clothes and roared at him aggressively.
Zain, jealous and angry: "You've gone crazy. What are you saying? Don't you have any respect for yourself? This is Khadija. Not someone you picked up off the street.?!"
Marwan got angry and grabbed Zain's hand, violently pushed it away, and shouted at him.
Marwan, confused by his brother's anger: "It's none of your business. Someone is talking about his fiancée."
Net Malik, what's so upsetting you?
Zain tries to hide his jealousy: Because... Because... Dija is like a sister to me, and I'm like Ammar. I mean, if he were in my place and heard you say that about her, he wouldn't keep quiet. And I told you, she's not your fiancée yet. When you agree and marry her, say whatever you like before, no.
Marwan looked at him with annoyance, anger, and defiance.
Marwan: You'll agree and you'll see. And I'll marry her, Zain, with grace and patience. I'll marry her. And you'll see.
He left him and headed to his room.
Zain grabbed his lock of hair so tightly, he almost pulled it out from its roots, from the intensity of his anger and jealousy. Then he sat on the nearest seat and buried his face in his palms, sighing with the fire of jealousy that was killing him.
Aaaah, O Lord, O Lord, have mercy on me, have mercy on me from this torment.